Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(803): View more from South Carolina

I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!

(704): View more from North Carolina

Well, there goes breastfeeding.

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(407): View more from Florida

he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...

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(207): View more from Maine

You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.

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(319): View more from Iowa

Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things

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(775): View more from Nevada

Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting

(978): View more from Massachusetts

In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!

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