And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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