Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
