In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
