dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
