3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize