Christians are straight up FREAKS
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
