D3 body, D1 cock
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
