You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
