I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
