Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
At least make sure they are 18
Why
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
