Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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