My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
ttyl tear gas
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Randomize
