Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
