So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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