i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Randomize
