I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
