Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
God, I missed his penis.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize