We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
