FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
she looked like the before picture.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
