Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
