I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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