When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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