i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
