OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
This baby is an asshole
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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