Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
