She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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