That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize