Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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