YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Randomize
