Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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