She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
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