he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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