Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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