You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
