Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
