just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
