that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Someone signed my nipple.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
