They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
