Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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