are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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