2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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