Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize