Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
