I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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