On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
