Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
What a dumb baby whore.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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