i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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