you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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