know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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