She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
